Nick Case’s project, The Evolution of Trust (interactive game), shares a truth about human interaction: the mirroring effect. When someone is jealous and sends out the vibe in the space, it spreads. Jealousy often happens because we have sensed our loss (attention or special treatment) in a relationship.
Envy is close to jealousy but it’s about wanting to have something that otherpeople have that we don’t, according to Brené Brown’s Atlas of theHeart.
Both jealousy and envy can be strategies to express the real feelings behind anger, sadness, fear, and yearning, but with side effects. They are the results of comparison that could hurt relationships and create more pain than the emotions that we are already experiencing.
When noticing jealousy and envy, it’s helpful to take a pause and be curious. Am I comparing myself to the other person? What are the reasons driving me todo so? What are my needs behind these reasons? What might truly serve me instead of comparing?
We always have the choice when facing comparison vs. connection. Helping ourselves get to the point where we can be centered enough to choose is self-empathy.
